My days and thoughts....

Blog covering some selected happenings in my life.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Returning from the Dead. What next?

Well, it has been almost 4 years since I have started this blog. I don't know why have stopped writing in it. Obviously, by skimming through the dozen of posts I have written, most of my posts are about rants, criticizing, pathetic comparisons, some personal diaries and some technical posts. This would lead to the conclusion that I am not focused and this blog should be specialized. Well when I started this blog 4 years ago, it was first meant to be a bit political. Then I started 4 other blogs for technical and personal posts. Then I decided to let it all be in one. I was treating it as way to think out loudly or to log some diary entries but online.

Anyways, I lost my interest in writing later on after I graduated, so I ignored this blog. But many times I feel like I want to write down some thoughts. Back in time, at the the height of this blog, when I used to feel that I wanted to write, it was I had an urge to write just like the urge to pee and holding it for a long time in the cold. I would rush back home to and turn on my computer, and keep on writing and writing. I would format my text, add pictures and hyperlinks. Somehow I treated the post as if its a writing assignment that I like. I hated these stupid essays. Although I regret not paying attention to the writing courses, but the instructors and their topics were really boring and not appealing.

These days, however, I started feeling that I want to write again. I want to express some inner feelings and thoughts. Some of these thoughts are religious, other are philosophical. Hang on, what the heck is philosophical and why I am calling them so? May be this is what I call challenging dogmatic teachings..dogmatic? Basically, a lot of controversial thoughts has been going around in my head. I decided to let some of these escape to this hideout. Yes, I still call this place a hideout although I am aware some of the people I know have stumbled upon this blog because I stupidly used my nickname to sign these posts.

Well, giving myself more freedom in expressing myself, and given the fact this place has been quiet for some good time, allowing it disappear from google's first page when searched for with its title, I decided to change my pen name. I choose Lazarus. Why that name? Because as I said, I decided to revive this blog, bringing it out from the dead. Jesus Christ revived a guy called Lazarus and brought him back from the dead. I like the hebrew form of the name more, but Lazarus has a better sound in my head. I am not contradicting myself here. Sounding better in my head doesn't have to make me like it more. Actually, the name Satan has a better sound and its easier and more lighter for pronounciation than the word angel.

So what are my next steps or posts would be about? While browsing through the links in dashboard and refamiliarizing myself with the management settings of the blogs, I found a couple of draft posts. I think I should still post these. duuuh, I have spent more than an hour writing this post. That's enough for my return.

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